Friday, May 16, 2008

Mid-Life Crisis? Culture Shock? Identity Crisis? All of the Above?

Ok, I never understood the Mid-Life crisis thing. The way it works, you hit your 40's and suddenly start to see the world differently. You can almost hear the clock ticking down so you go out and buy a sports car, change your appearance or have an affair. How can that happen? How can the world look different all of sudden.

Well, I'm starting to understand MLC. Not sure why, I'm starting to wonder if there is somekind of on/off switch or chemical that is released once the body reaches a certain day on the calendar.

I used to be mistaken for 17, for the longest time. Really, it was almost annoying but lately, hmmm. Well, I told you about the Sam's Club grandma thing and it hasn't stopped. My doc is asking about menopause, I'm getting weird illnesses like a fatty tumor and pains in my legs. Pre-school mom's are asking me about motherhood "over 40".

I've been away from my endurance workouts for 4 weeks now. I've run a little and swam a little but my desire to jump back into it isn't what I thought it would be. Sure, I talked to that mom at that birthday party a while back. She was so smug, I wanted to show how it's done. But, I'm gonna make a fool out of myself if I don't get rid of the excuses and get my butt in gear. I'm actually missing the Galena tri tomorrow. Part of me could careless and the other part is yelling what the hell is going on here?! I have a 1/2 Ironman in less than a month. I'm I trained for it. Nope. But, I'm gonna do it and this is what I'm hoping.... that it will be my spark. It will light the match that reignites that desire to get out there again.

I know that somehow, there is a way, to balance training, family and life. I know I can do it all. Why all of sudden, at 43, I'm believing in "Crisis" instead of "spirit". UGH!

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Get Well Soon

Happy Mother's Day

Pre-kids mother's day was never a good day for me. Depressed doesn't describe what I would feel during this time.

The hubby was so patient with me. For those who don't know, he's this funny, funny man - one of the reasons I married him was because he makes me laugh. Well, nothing could make me laugh when mother's day rolled around - that is until he came up with another way to celebrate the day about 12 years ago. All I really remember is him handing me a bunch of cards and I shook my head and started to cry. He told me to just open them. I did. I couldn't stop laughing. They were quirking and stupid and just plain old "Scott" funny. It made the day a little more bearable. We celebrated "Get Well Soon Day" every mother's day after that.

Grace and Zak are now 5. The official last GWSD was celebrated in 2002. I was indeed pregnant when we celebrated it but didn't know it.

Happy Mother's Day - to all who are mother's - and Get Well Soon to all the mother's patiently waiting :)

Monday, May 5, 2008

This is Living :)

Friday night Gracie had dress rehearsal. Scott had to work on Saturday and miss the official recital so we all took her and went for ice cream afterwards. She was so happy her dad got to see her dance up on the big stage. She kept waving to him. :)

Saturday morning was cold and wet. Just the kind of weather that can completely melt a little ballerina and her costume. Thankfully the weather took a break long enough for me and Grace to get in the school. I then quickly headed back home to pick up the grandmas, Zak and auntie to go and watch my daughter perform as a little wooden puppet. She was amazing of course. And, Zak was really good just sitting and watching the entire 45 minute performance. Afterwards we were off to the restaurant of Gracie's choice (Applebee's) for a celebration lunch.

Sunday Scott worked so the kids and I woke up at 5:30 and headed off to the half marathon to watch 14 of our closest club members run the local half marathon. We had an amazing morning for it. Perfect weather for a half. Was feeling a little sad for not doing it but actually had a great time taking pictures and cheering everyone on.

This is a pic of me and kids shadow waiting for the club to meet us for a group picture. Zak's got his arms up, he said he was flying like a raptor - of course :)

Had a good talk with Scott i about taking some time off and just enjoying everything I've been missing because of all the training I've done over the past year and a half. It's funny cause part of me misses being out there with the gang but part of me is really content just hanging with the kids and cheering from the sidelines.

After the race I took the kids over to my favorite trail spot. I think Gracie has trail running in her blood. She started out using the bridge but before the afternoon was over she was running through the creek. :) Zak just wanted for find a lizard to take home. Thankfully, one was never found - phew :)

I think it's time to get back to things. I'll be starting out slow for sure but I'm sure the pace will pick up in no time. Hmmm, maybe I'll be ready to do the DU - Didn't say I was racing , just thinking I might be ready :)